I really wanted to write a post, because I had again want (and especially courage) I tackle large canvases.
And I need to talk about this: courage.
It may seem so easy when you see the number of paintings that can perform the most prolific artists.
So I am a restored truth paint is difficult.
Even with 20 years of career behind you paint will always be difficult.
Why is this so hard? Because paint pose with you even you and all the emotions, the feelings you have towards you. And they are not always pretty-pretty. If you’re a bit like me, it’s even quite the opposite!
That takes guts, so to get naked (more than putting his own naked body because there is tone interior that shatters).
So this is it. If we had the never told you, I do it here: paint is difficult. Paint will always be.
Your first canvas to the last.
You will pass by moments of joy, moments where you feel you less than nothing, moments when you embrace your process where you smile before a new color, where you will weep to have covered an area that you loved, where you will hate you for failing to do as well as your last picture.
You will also have moments of intense clarity. And a quick one, you will end up being proud of you.
It will not be a moment too. Because you already think to the next canvas. That makes you sweat so much. The one you dream at night. One that haunts you and makes you afraid.
In painting, you feel yourself in distress like never before. Fragile, vulnerable to a point that you will never have experienced.
And it will make you afraid. Oh yes, it will do you fear to find you and to yourself. Face your shadows. Face your deepest wounds.
THIS IS THAT ALL GOING TO PLAY (and saw you, I put capitalized for you to feel well the drama of the thing!)
Yes, this is where it all happens. Because painting is so difficult, you will want to stop.
You will want to stop at every canvas.
You will want to stop 10,000 times.
But if you know that painting is hard, that wanting to stop everything is normal, then maybe you continue.
You will recognize these hard times when you will want to turn your back on your paintings. Perhaps you will tell you it does not matter, it’s only a passage, and you embrace this moment, like the others. Then you put you pause (no, you do not stop you, because the meaning of the verb stop includes a final side). You put you pause, 1 hour, 1 day or 1 year. But you resume.
Because you know now that paint is difficult.